Hazy Minded Survival Test

Samantha Meldrum

Kristina Rodgers

English 1A

February 19, 2013

Hazy Minded Survival Test

Starting off a weekend exploring the rocky terrain of the Santa Monica Mountains it never occurred to me that I would be facing my first near death experience at the age of fifteen. Being the self-absorbed teenager I was at the time when I heard about going on a family reunion camping trip I was not concerned about how I would spread my time evenly visiting with long distance relatives. Instead, I was more focused on being able to bring my best friend along for adventures in a foreign area. When I finally got my way, my friend Regan and I instantly started plotting how we could get away with any sort of trouble we could manage bringing along with us in our suitcases. The first day was mellow consisting of staying near the campgrounds in attempt to show that I was not just all about my friend. After everybody was settled in we grabbed my favorite cousins, Jimmy and Brandon, and began our search of our new favorite escape spots for the remainder of the trip.

We soon discovered paths that led through the various mountains and hiked for hours. We found that at the edge of the main mountains cliff, the path leading down to the ground was narrow enough that you could slide down on your butt. Even though there were jagged rocks sticking out of the ground and they felt as though blades were being scraped under our butts we found it was quicker to slide rather than struggle with the steep climb down. Now that we had our hiking routes mapped out we sprinted to the camp grounds to grab our secret weapon of guaranteed fun we had stowed away in our bags. Being young teenagers we thought we were so cool with our pre-rolled joints we brought along. Regan and I had convinced my cousins to tag along with us to enjoy the forbidden plant and we secretively went on another mission to find our new sacred hide away.

The camp grounds seemed as though they were at least a days’ trip away and hidden beneath the dark thick foliage. To us, our spot was hidden from the world and we would never be found. In the middle of smoking our joint we heard the loud roaring of a chopper. Filled immediately with paranoia my friend, cousins, and I started screaming, “It’s a cop copter!” “They’re gonna arrest us” “I can’t go to jail!” We panicked and in fear of arrest we stomped out our half burned joint that was sought to lead us to a relaxing evening and rushed into taking pictures of each other. Trying to act natural we realized that we were nowhere near hidden! Just on the other edge of the mountain ran the freeway where busy traffic filled the coast. We were all equally bewildered at the fact of how brilliant our plan was and how it was so easily shattered. Come to our dismay it was nothing more than what seemed to be a personal helicopter that was in reality so far away that we were most likely as visible as a white cat in a pile of fresh snow. We slid down the sharp points of the mountain to gain rest and a better plan that would guarantee us a day of leisure and care free hiking adventures.

The next morning Regan and I were awoken by the sounds of uncontrollable laughter and wrestling in the tent next to ours. We were not surprised to find that my Sister, Amanda, and her friend, Shayne, had started their partying for the day. They were just barely 21 at the time and to them drinking for the whole trip was there civil duty. We explained to them how our amazing plan was crushed so simply expecting them to cry in rage, agreement, and confusion about why it did not work out. Instead we were returned with wild laughter similar to that of woody the wood pecker’s and mockery followed by smart comments about how young we were and we didn’t know how to get away with anything. Knowing that they were already as drunk as an Irish man on St. Patrick’s Day we turned their snootiness around on them to manipulate them into finding us a good hiding spot. They were quick on the challenge just as expected so we grabbed the necessary tools for our “ideal” day and whatever shoes were closest by. My two boy cousins had been up long before and were wearing sneakers and appropriate cargo pants that would be appropriate for the journey we were about to endure. Regan and I on the other hand were wearing flats, sweats, and big sweatshirts from the night before. Not caring about being ready for a long hike we set off on our mission to smoke our weed and chill out for a large remainder of the day.

The wind was ferociously whipping our hair into our eyes as we hiked to this unimaginable spot Amanda and Shayne boasted about. After trekking up the mountain behind them for a few miles we realized they were simply wandering with no real destination at all. Full of frustration with nowhere to block us from the wind we desperately hid under a bush in attempt to keep our doobie lit. Fighting with the lighter and constantly pulling our sweaters over our heads as though impersonating Cornholio we were able to smoke a good amount of our forbidden freedom and popped up to realize Shayne had wandered off. Now in a foggy daze of misjudgment we once again panicked and frantically started running and screaming to find Shayne. My cousin Brandon split with my Sister and Regan and I found ourselves teamed up with my older cousin Jimmy. We searched for him as though we were dogs after a murderer in the woods. We were dedicated to finding him, in fear that he would be found days later shriveled up dehydrated under small shrubs. We had the feeling that this hunt would never be over searching all over for him when suddenly we encountered the edge of the mountain again. This time we were more aware of what was awaiting on the other edge and when we spotted the sand dunes Shayne was the last thing on our minds. Now we had a new obsession, figure out a way to get to the creamy dunes.

Planning my different routes down to the dunes I first attempted to climb down some bushes on the edge of the cliff and was immediately aware that it would likely lead to the end of my short life. Just as I started to feel the hopelessness of reaching the dunes sink in I heard Regan scream that she found the perfect way! I ran over and spotted her brilliant plan. “How had I over looked it?”, I thought to myself “I must be really blown”, because right in front of me was another slide formed on the edge of the mountain leading straight down to the dunes. I did not mind that the rocks would stab me hard or that I was wearing flimsy flats. I knew that once I got to the dunes I could relax then run across the highway to reach the beach. Regan and I slid down that rocky slide as quick as a sled slides in the snow. We were laughing and shouting with remarks of how easy this was and making fun of jimmy for staying behind and being scared when suddenly the narrow path ended and my feet were hanging off the edge of the cliff!!

Not worried about Shayne or reaching the dunes our brains were instantly wired with survival techniques retained from Man Vs. Wild from the Discovery Channel. Still in my stony haze all I could remember was eating bugs and I screamed to Regan that we were going to die. We were able to grab onto some branches of an ivy bush but our legs dangled off the side of the cliff like ornaments hanging off of a chandelier. Regan and I looked at each other, looked down at the long fall that would land us to a messy splatter on the freeway and started crying. We told each other how much we loved each other and how we know why D.A.R.E. told us weed was bad. I promised her if we survived I would never smoke the stuff again. She looked me in the eyes and said, “Sam, we are not going to live to smoke again”. Then suddenly with my one track hazy mindset I looked down at the ivy and screamed, “poison ivy!” Our focus immediately switched from the fear of death to the fear of having an intense rash cover our arms! We pulled ourselves up that mountain as though we were in a military drill and helped push and pull each other to the top.

Barely believing that we had survived hanging off the cliff we were set on finding our way back to the camp grounds and grabbing my parents so they could help us find the others when my cousins, sister, and Shayne came walking from behind some bushes exclaiming, “Did you see those sand dunes!? Let’s climb down to them!”