Childhood traumas

                                                             Childhood Traumas
            I don't remember much, but what I do remember is good enough for me. It was a usual Loza Sunday which included my parents, two brothers, grandparents and sister. We started off our day with church Sunday then continued on to brunch. One of three things happen after brunch, either we go grocery shopping, go home, or go visit some relatives. This specific weekend it happened to be grocery shopping time. It was during the Spring and it was not too hot not too cold; I was around six, and wearing a bright red dress, with lace lining around the bottom of the skirt, the lace was much like the designs on those of a corset. My stockings were white and matched with my all white socks with white lace type material fluffed out and, white close toed strapped shoes. My straight hair flowed down to my shoulders with only small amounts of hair clipped together with a white bow clip.
            All eight of us got in the stripped black Chevy Astro, my well groomed dad was the driver. He was wearing a white long sleeved button up shirt (he doesn't really like short sleeve), with black wrangler jeans, black boots and his white Mexican hat. My mother was riding passenger, she was wearing a tan skirt suit. The top had 5 pearl buttons, her earrings matched the buttons and her hair like mine, had some hair clipped while the rest of her curly hair hung down. My grandparents and little brother were in the middle row watching TV while my sister Lilia, older brother Manny and I were in the very back seat.

            We all got out the van and walked to the store, my dad grabbed the cart and walked behind my mother and us behind them, like we always do. We all scattered about playing with the toys and bouncing the balls, while my grandparents did all their shopping separately. My parents finished grabbing everything they had to grab so they can head to the checkout line. Soon after they head to the lines my grandparents decide they’re done too. My siblings and I skip around from my grandparents to parents just looking to see where they’re in line. My parents finish paying first, so my dad hurries out so he can get a head start in fixing the groceries before my grandparents take theirs. My siblings and I ran along after my parents and we watched them pack the trunk. My dad finishes fixing the groceries and tells me to run inside to see if my grandparents are almost done, so I run inside to check.    
            I run in to the cashier sections at Food 4 Less in Woodland and I see my grandparents so I rush to them. I stand around with them for a little and then I begin to get tempted by the red cheetos peeking at me through the clear cover on the red bag. I reach for the bag. My grandma tells me to put the cheetos on her side of the separation bar, but when I don’t she grabs them and does it herself. I take it out because I want to be a big girl and pay for the bag all by myself with my one dollar. I patiently wait for the lady in front of me to finish paying for hers things so it can finally be my turn. I hurry, pay, and then run outside so we can all leave. As I run out the two electric doors I look around and only to see the stripped black Astro, my families’ Astro, turning left onto the main road. Leaving.

            As I see them drive away my eyes get full of water with my hand extended out yelling, “Stop!” hoping that somehow they'll hear me. By this point the tears are trailing down my cheeks. I stand on the edge of the road, just a little bit further from the dip in the sidewalk, looking around wondering what just happened. At this point I'm crying loudly not knowing what to do until a white car pulls up. There is an elderly woman with white hair and colored lips, she tells me to calm down. She then asks me what's wrong and where my parents are which only makes me weep more. I cry and cry until I can finally tell her I was in the store and when I was coming out I saw our car driving away. By this point there are a couple people around me trying to comfort me, telling me that my parents will be back and telling me not to worry. The elderly woman that first drove up to me had already gotten off the car and led me to the sidewalk. There is a nice lady asking me for my name, where I’m from, and if I knew any numbers that she could dial to try and get a hold of. I’m so young that I only know two peoples’ numbers, my house, and my grandparents’ house. Though I know it’s hopeless (because it takes a while to get home) I give her the two numbers and hope that there will be an answer. The lady dials, she doesn’t even have to say it, her face says it all, no answer.
             It feels like way too much time has gone by and I’m still crying. I’m so scared, not knowing what’s going to happen to me. I keep wondering if I’m ever going to see my mom again, my siblings, and my daddy. I keep trying to remember what my house looks like, what my favorite teddy bear looks, but most of all, what the car that left me looks like. The people that were around me are still standing with me when I see it. I see the van rushing from my left side and then turn into the parking lots and I instantly become one of the happiest kids in the world. I become even happier as I saw the van get closer and my mother rushed out to me. She held me tight apologizing for what happened. While hugging my mom, I see my dad coming around the van to me and the large sliding door. My father hugs me after my mother, then my grandparents and lastly my siblings. My parents thank the people that were with me comforting and staying with me. Soon after that my parents make sure to get us all in the car and we head out for home.
            While on the car ride home Lilia and Manny comfort me and get me to stop crying. When I’m finally calm, my grandmother asks me, “where were you? Where did you go?”
I tell her, “I was paying for my cheetos after you left and when I came out you were all gone” my grandmother doesn’t say much as realization shows on her face.  At that point my mom tells me she can’t believe this happened, she keeps apologizing for leaving and taking so long to come back. I don’t say much, I’m  just wondering how my grandma didn’t remember she saw me stay in the store and how it took so long for them to notice I was gone. As we’re getting to Davis my sister points out where they were driving by when they noticed I want in the car. Turns out her and Manny were playing around in the back when she asked for me.  My mother said she thought I was in the back, Lilia says, “We thought she was in the front”. That’s the moment when my family realized I wasn’t in the car, my dad immediately turned around and headed back to Woodland arguing with one another and how no one noticed I wasn’t in the van.

            The fact that it took my family the trip from Woodland to Davis is a little shocking, and at first I didn’t know how that could happen. Until recently did I think that the reason they didn’t notice was that they were too caught up in their conversations and my brothers and sister are all too loud, too hectic. I hate what happened to me but in the end it taught my parents to always double check before we leave some place to make sure all her kids are in the car. It’s funny that my parents didn’t think I’d remember what happened until not too long ago. When telling my parents I noticed that I remember the elderly lady in the white car, what I was wearing, and what my parents were wearing. I remember them vividly and I think it is because I was most scared I wasn’t going to see them again and because the elderly lady was a huge help. My parents were shocked I remembered and kept apologizing while my siblings, especially Lilia, all laugh at what happened for cheetos.